(TMI-ARMY Files) 1978 - GRILL FLAME (RV)

that's not real either. And then I--and then next thing that happened, 1 can't put into words, but it's kind of like, there's a trigger in your mind, or in your essence that's very primitive. It's a fear reaction type trigger and I felt like that was touched, Okay. But not, you know, (mumble) on the old trigger, it's sorta like somebody just reached out and touched it, and said that's the last message, you know, it's like read this clear. Okay. And once I, and it was very overwhelming and then once i sensed that, then I said, "No, I cannot accept that as real either," even though it's really traumatic, so 1 went back and I said, in the white box, I said, "I know what you're trying to do is turn me off in the box and I understand that message and I will go away for now, but understand that I understand that." ang then I came back here. And, a... Was there any Tesponse to that last comment? None, none, other then I wanted to puke laying on my back. I mean it's really a disturbing feeling, you know. What does this tell you about this defense mechanism you ran into? --- PAGE 10 (OCR) --- SUB: MON: SUB; MON: SUB: MON: SUB: Te Aone are om nema en ewe Lths very sophisticated in some respect, but it's not in another, you know, It's Sophisticated in the effect it has in (yawn)=~-excuse me--in the technology that's involved ang everything, but that it resorts to such a quick defense versus would seem to be very Primitive, It's almost like an assumption, You know, they're assuming like Ln, it yOu can take the whole Occurences like invading, me invading the body, you know, I'm a new virus and I come in the boay,. It's like it's immediate, you know, eradicate the virus, don't try to communicate with it, and don't try to Participate with it. That's too Strong, it's more like ane 7 nere-comes-another-one-of thems kind of thing, like there's no trust. I don't know how to explain it, Okay, do you feel that if yOu had been in another mode that you Could have-~do you feel that this defensive mechanism could have, you could have been defensive in Nature ana Protected yourself from it if you went into it that Way--or another And, and 1 think that's why I agree with that, 1 agree with that 100%. Ang the reason I Say that is initially when the guy, or the figure or whatever it was Pointed his finger at me, or it wasn't like he was really Pointing a finger, it was like he was Saying, i recognize your presence, you his chest ang the light came to me. My first that time was that I have no fear, do whatever you want and 1 was dealing with that all right, Okay, until in the white box, whatever the switch is, I touched the switch and JI mean it is Teally abh...you know-- What does that tell you about yourself? It tells me that I'm not as Fearless as J think I might be. And that Somebody else knows that then? Yes. |. It gives ine something to work on. I can handle the Feeling, ah... wat --- PAGE 11 (OCR) --- MON: SUB: MON: SUB: MON: SUB: MON: Is there anything else you want to say? I have a burning desire to know what the Fe----g target was. Well, me too or why we were asked to explore it. Really weird. Really, really strange. You may know more about it then anybody else. Okay fine. Well, whenever I get feedback, let me know. Okay. il