Explorer AMS Audio Files & Transcripts

I'm trying to understand how that idea fits in with with being with being me and supporting me 34:06 i the sense that I felt is that 34:19 is that I didn't have to be or do anything other than then what I what I was good. I didn't have to try to 34:55 I didn't have to try to change something about myself or or do something in particular or it just didn't mean that I was loved just for what I was that is strong picture or sense of of an unconditional love that there was no set 35:27 structure of anything it just 35:31 it feels good 35:56 I'm drawn back to the 36:00 to the old images of the prior session with all with the erector setting connecting all my different problems and the statue again the statue of the Christ figure with the two heads are two sides of the face so these two faces are against Larry and my father I don't see how this image fits in how this is connected 36:56 the image of Larry and my father are 37:06 connected to abuse 37:13 that's the only 37:14 connection I see to that picture 37:24 and then I'm back at home again in the basement 37:50 and I see myself dressed in a 37:56 in a bizarre outfit 37:58 and I'm being placed on a table or a stretcher and the other person is Larry he's also dressed in a bizarre outfit 38:17 and just so 38:32 what his what he's using of like us device and putting it in my vagina and then taking it out and twisting the table and then doing it again over and over like a torture technique 38:56 but it's like there's no emotion involved in this at all. No sense of pain, no motion just just an image 39:13 trying to recede from the image and go back out outside the house, in the yard and I can see myself looking down on the house 39:31 trying to withdraw from this force base of time 40:19 Number back in the basement again And Larry's laughing and bizarre laugh and he's 40:46 this border being spun around and round and round and round until I spy on being flung out into the universe 41:02 out into space 41:06 I'm trying to find a space that's free from these 41:11 negative images. 41:45 Unsettling thing is that in this image I see Larry as evil and I feel the unsafe pneus and the evilness about him. And yet, when I'm attempting to look at him in this image, I see the other presents from the other image which he was, which was the loving kind image. And I was seeing these two images of him simultaneously